Tick Tock....

Do you ever just stop and ask yourself "Where does the time go?" or "Why does time seem to go faster the more I try to slow down and relish it?"  This summer is flying by for me and although I'm having a BLAST, today for some reason I'm just overwhelmed with how fast it seems to be going by.  I've managed to keep a fairly light "schedule" for the kids this summer, and somehow we've not been able to get to bed before 10:00 on a single night!  They've just had the best time of having FREEDOM!  Freedom to explore, freedom to play, freedom to watch a little tv... which in turn gives me a little "freedom" to catch up on e-mail, facebook and my blog.

This morning when I looked at Colby, he looked like a grown boy.  I don't know if it's the summer buzz, his newly missing front tooth, or the latest growth spurt, but oh how it caught me off guard the sadness and pride that I felt silmutaneously as he poured himself a glass of milk.  Although he's been doing that for quite some time, today it hit me like a ton of bricks... he's growing up.  I guess I shouldn't have been so surprised, he'll be 8 years old this fall, but still... it feels like yesterday we were bringing him home from the hospital!  Hard to believe I know since that was 5 moves ago!! LOL!

As hard as it is to see him grow up and away from the shelter I've covered him with for so many years...I love seeing the seeds of faith that we've been planting in his heart start to bloom and grow.  Just yesterday on the way to church, he was reading his Bible and said, "Man mom, I really like this story in Deuteronomy.  It's all about obeying... just like YOU talk about all the time!"  LOL!!!  The tone in his voice was excited surprise... like he finally realized I wasn't the one who invented that word and that we had been telling him the truth all this time that it IS one of God's rules!  I guess somethings you just have to affirm for yourself!

With my new found "awareness" of the days slipping by I decided to commit to being intentional with the kids today.  Chloe and I enjoyed our traditional leisurly Monday trip to the grocery store.  She's actually gotten quite good at "organizing" the grocery cart... probably something only her "type A", grocery store-loving mother could appreciate! LOL!  She has become quite the little "sous-chef" and I can hardley set foot in the kitchen without her popping up behind me with her "stairs" (aka the step stool) asking me, "Whatcha doin' Momma?  Can I help?"  This is a picture of her and Jarred making chicken fried steak the other night.  She was SO proud because she finally got to crack an egg!

I've made no secret that this latest move has been the hardest on Madeline.  She is the most tender-hearted of our three and although she's shy at times she loves without reservation -- unless she's hurting.  Not only did our relocation uproot her from the only "home" she remembers, it was a difficult time for our mother-daughter relationship.  Because Jarred was having to juggle both his previous and current positions he was traveling almost 100% of the time which required me to have to draw the line between "nuturing mommy" and "practical/survival mommy".  I'm sad to say that I had to be the "disciplinarian" the majority of the time and our relationship suffered.  Thankfully with the help of a little ice cream, pedicures, story books, and LOTS of "I love you" she's come around and we actually enjoyed playing barbies and ponies in her room this afternoon.  My heart just melted later when she just came and climbed in my lap and gave me the biggest hug.  I asked her, "What was that for?" and she said, "I just felt like loving on you!".  Ohhhh!  I can't put into words how wonderful it felt!

I know I can't stop time, nor do I want to.  I just want to remember to take advantage of the time we have together and I pray that I remember to be intentional with each of my children on a daily basis.  Because as hard as it is to let them grow and go, it's the most beautiful and rewarding thing, and I would hate to miss it.